The Bag Issue!

To overcome all urges of suicide by paper-cut, or the existential crisis I seem to be suffering, I thought a girly (annoying) post to raise the moral (mine).

Gentlemen I suggest you look away now….

I am going to discuss handbags, yes, you read correctly, Handbags, I want to talk about my damn handbag because I am…..well…it’s worth it! (damn you L’Oréal)

They say once you go designer, you can never go back, and it’s absolutely true, so the ladies out there who are still happy with their H&Ms and Zaras, I advice you never go down the designer path, because you will be experiencing substance abuse issues and within 3 years, you will be staring at your house deposit, sitting in your wardrobe stacked in cotton pouches like some treasure saved for the cold days, as it were!  And one day you will have no job and no money and you can’t sell your bags because you love them so much so you keep them with you and carry them around and that’s how you become the ‘Bag Lady’.

Lousy attempt at raising the moral above, I admit, so I am going to try again…

The content of a lady’s bag says a lot about her personality they say!
Today, my bag is Red, designer naturally (show off, yes but name dropper, NO), has 4 pockets, all full of treasures, content is as follows (gentlemen I told you to stay away):

Perfume, 2 phones (I am well dodgy), makiyage (that’s makeup for you), umbrella, Book, elastic bands, pair of spare (clean) knickers, tangled headphones, lip balm, hand cream, cleanex, purse (also red but not on purpose), 2 sets of keys (I am the janitor), oyster card, work security pass, gloves, ballet pumps (that’s flat shoes for you), a bottle of mineral water and a box of paracetamol (you never know when I'll need to fake a headache), and finally a pen which I stole from work.

So there, what my bag says about me is that I am a girl! Nothing more, nothing less.  Don’t attempt to analyse me through my bag’s contents because it’s not relevant, I am crazy and my bag doesn’t reflect that, I am a control freak and a little OCD, the bag still doesn’t reflect that and neither does this blog, so …I told you so stay away!

So why women carry handbags, across the chests, on their shoulders or their arms, in blue, red or black is not relevant here, of course we know the colour, shape and design say a lot about our personalities, but the real reason for the bag is that it represents our safety net, we carry a little piece of our lives and our homes with us, we feel naked without it and that’s how the bag lady came to exist, she lost everything but could never part from her beloved bag(s).

Dz-Chick….if she were a bag, she’d be a Mulberry Picadilly!